In honor of our success getting #killcarlalready trending last night, we’d like to review:
10 Reasons That The Walking Dead Should Just Kill Carl
- Carl, stay in the house.
- Seriously, Carl. Stay in the house.
- Carl, I don’t want to yell but it’s the middle of the zombie apocalypse and we’re going to need you to stay close by.
- Okay, buddy. Can you be a good little sheriff and stay put? I don’t know, guard the living room. Yes, okay here’s a special hat and you are officially on duty to protect the couch cushions. Just stay in the house.
- Carl, I’d ground you but it seems a bit trite what with the hordes of Zombies outside trying to eat our faces.
- Remember what happened when another little kid wandered off alone? You were here for that.
- It’s great you’re keeping your childish rebellion alive but if one of the bad guys gets you, Daddy is going to have to shoot you in the head.
- Please, Carl. Just stay here. I’ll be right back. Protect the couch cushions. Make some lunch. Get back to doing that math homework we inexplicably cared about 4 episodes ago.
- Carl, I’m not fucking around. Please, Carl. Just stay in the house. Do this one fucking thing. Just stay in the house for the next 5 minutes.
- HAS ANYONE SEEN CARL?? HE’S NOT IN THE HOUSE.